Drum Journey (Recording): ~30 minutes
During my morning meditation, I again received a call to journey. As it was with my last journey, I had no intention. I was called to Lower World. Lower World: It was dusk. A pink, purple, and yellow sunset illuminated the mountains ahead of me. Hummingbird came to greet me. It had been some time since I journeyed, and I was ashamed. I said something of the sort to Hummingbird, but even as the words left my lips, I could see that they were irrelevant. Hummingbird flew off eastward, and I followed. On the path, I stopped to lean against a tree as I was very overcome and tired. I thought I needed to set an intention, so I tried to. My OR shamanic teacher, Elaine, told me I should ask about a recent dream I had.* My mind went into the dream again and replayed the confusing part. Hummingbird said, You already know the meaning of the dream. I was transported quickly to a field where there was a sacred fire with a ring of small fires around it. Reeds Blowing sat at the edge of it, sprinkling powdered herbs into the fire. I wondered what he was doing here, since I usually meet him in Upper World unless there is a gathering at the council fire. I knew not to ask, though. Grandmother, too, was there, tearing up pieces of red organ meat and throwing them on the fire. Great Walker drummed in the background. I noticed then that I had a blue plaster stuck to my lower abdomen. I asked what it was. Reeds Blowing said it was made of Blue Poppy, Camphor, Mustard, and other herbs. I asked Grandmother what she was putting on the fire. Your uterus, she said. I was shocked. "Does that mean I don't have a uterus anymore?" Of course not, this is a symbol. This is your old uterus. It is diseased, carrying the pain of your ancestors. You will receive a new one. Grandmother began singing and walking around the fire. She gestured violently toward the fire, as if casting out dark energy. The flames rose with each gesturing. Grandmother took a burning stick from the fire and placed it on my abdomen. I was moving quickly without volition: lying down, sitting up, standing... She placed her hands on my lower back and abdomen as she sang. She led me around the fire, singing. Great Walker tossed me my drum, and I drummed along and sang with her. Soon, I felt pressure in my abdomen. The plaster was removed. I crouched on the grass and passed the uterus out of my body. It was not painful, but it was difficult work. Grandmother took it and threw it on the fire. Immediately, smoke-like beings rose from the fire and into the atmosphere. I recognized them as my ancestors—women and men. They clouded the sky. She and Reeds Blowing began to chant together. Reeds Blowing took a staff and stirred in the air. This whipped the smokey spirit beings around like cotton candy on his staff. He then hurled them into space. I could see or sense them all settling into the lost soul places where they belonged if they had allowed themselves to return Home and be redistributed as Nature intended. Grandmother crafted a small clay vessel within the fire. She blew into its opening spirit energy and placed various herbs within it. This, she placed over my abdomen, where it sunk in, assuming the place of my old uterus. I was very tired. I found myself mentally drifting, then "awoke" to find myself lying in a room on a bed, recovering. Everything felt very slow. I heard Grandmother's voice tell me that I needed to rest now. Callback sounded. I thanked, Hummingbird, Reeds Blowing, Grandmother, and Great Walker then returned. ________________________ *Friends of my estranged husband banged a hole in my wall, claiming that I was hiding gold in there. I assured them I was not. They found nothing in the walls and retreated. I cheekily told them they owed me $20 to fix the hole. Upon waking, I thought that it meant I was not hiding any of my gifts. But as I journeyed, I thought it perhaps it meant that I had none to hide. Then I realized it was not about the gifts themselves, but the hiding part. What of worth am I hiding? Nothing. And destruction of my home must be compensated for.
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Drum Journey (Recorded drumming): ~15 minutes
Lower World Grey Wolf Mother accompanied me to the hot spring entrance in spirit form, as she had left with me before. We arrived together, and she again assumed full form as we reached LW. We walked to the Sacred Fire Circle, where all the CHSes were gathered. GWM sat in front of Reeds Blowing. Reed Blowing spoke, saying: You have accomplished the task you set out to accomplish. regardless of the outcome, we are with you always. I spoke afterward, thanking everyone, especially GWM and RB. Great Walker came out and placed a red mark on my left shoulder, I was not certain what this was for. My Nashawe symbol came ot life on my right leg. GW began to drum. He asked me to drum and dance with him, which I did. The others began to sing/vocalize in their respective ways: GWM howled, Frog chirped, the wings of Hummingbird whirred, Tree rustled its leaves, Grandmother sang a low tone, RB chanted, Bell'ana made the song of the spheres, Turtle croaked and drummed his shell, Owl hooted, Black Hawk cried, Snake hissed, Raccoon chittered... After some time, they all took a piece of my body away and performed their own work on it. My energy merged with the fire until they were done. As the Callback sounded, my pieces came flying back together and I was whole again. I thanked everyone and expressed that I was sad to leave GWM in LW. I was grateful for her protection. Return to OR Drum Journey (Recorded drumming): ~15 minutes
Lower World I am currently in Day 48 of my 50-day initiation. This journey had a specific purpose, which was to consult my compassionate helping spirits who have assisted me on this initiation/internal retreat regarding my upcoming weekend away with my husband Khader. Specifically, I wished to address the restriction of alcohol consumption. This is our only solitary weekend holiday for the year. We are both celebrating graduation from our respective Masters programs. Having a relaxing weekend with no restrictions, would be rejuvenating and, in my view, necessary. (We'd like to have a champagne toast to celebrate, for example.) I visited the CHSes who were all gathered at the Sacred Fire Circle. Fire was burning high as I presented my case. I was concerned that my situation would seem petty. To some extent, even I felt it was; alcohol consumption over the weekend had not occurred to me until today. When I originally told him, Khader was disappointed but understood. I felt bad about disappointing him, but thought it was better to stay true to my practice. Later, I thought that making this adjustment may be a kind gesture for Khader and make our time together feel more connected. In this case, I began to see alcohol as part of the ritual celebration, not a way to escape. I knew that what I was really asking for was a stay of the 50-day agreement or some additional task I could perform to compensate. I received this guidance:
Then, Great Walker began to dance with his drum. I was told to join him. I had to make sure I had space to dance and drum. Lots of it! There were great leaps and swirls around. I felt lost in the drumming and in the feeling of movement. The rest of the journey continued this way until callback. Callback I thanked all the CHSes and returned. Return to Ordinary Reality. Drum Journey (Recorded drumming): ~15 minutes
Lower World When I arrived, there was nothing happening at the Sacred Circle. I lay down on the ground to await guidance. I heard Tree calling to me, so I went up the hill and entered through the opening at the base of Tree's trunk. I sat on a ledge within the center of the trunk. I saw the image of the tree cell in front of me, then looked to my right. The darkness extended far into the trunk, much longer than the space within the trunk itself. I walked into the darkness and was immediately shown an image of The World Drum: A circle representing the earth, with many drummers playing all over the surface. There were all kinds of drums playing, from many traditions, in every part of the world. The teaching was to listen to the drumming and see its effects on the atmosphere around the earth. The vibrations moved out into the air, but the resonance created a thicker core, closer to the earth—a blanket of sound and healing. One of the drums moved forward into view. I was told to merge with it. I tried, but I could not manage it. I tried again and again until finally I felt my physical body transform into the sense of the drum; my nervous system spread across my entire surface as the head of the drum. I was able to feel not just with the brain stem but with the whole of my being as the drum. Parts resonated more than others. The sweet spot on the drum where sounds most deeply resonate become the heart or brain of the being. I felt the vibrations moving through and out of me, lifting into the air around me. Each strike of the mallet was a deep pull inward them a release, creating the waves through, around, and out of me. I was not able to hold the merge for too long. I stepped out and was carried by the sounds of the drumming all around me. I saw the call for a World Drum Day where people could drum alone or in groups during a set period of time across the globe, creating these earth vibrations. I also saw a group healing with drums that could be done locally. Several drums healing one person at a time. There may be a need for that. I had returned to the ledge where I was sitting. Tree told me that I would have more to see when I became Nashawe. I carved the name on the trunk of Tree. It disappeared and then reappeared as though Tree was absorbing and integrating it. I embraced Tree and was lifted into he air, high above Lower World. I saw that it was vast; there was way more to Lower World than I had seen so far. I caught a glimpse of a faraway land where there was a zebra with feathers for a mane. I wanted to learn more about this animal, but the callback sounded. Callback I thanked Tree and World Drum then returned. Return to Ordinary Reality Drum Journey (Recording): ~15 minutes
Upper World I was called to the Hall of Knowledge. When I entered the library, the ornate room full of books, tables, and reading chairs changed into an Algonquin longhouse. At one end, I saw Great Walker making a drum. This will be your final project after the initiation. You will make your own drum. I asked what it should be made of. Deer, likely. There are many where you live and you are connected to them. They can carry you on your journeys. "What kind of wood?" I asked. Maple, cedar... That is not as important as every tree is connected to you and you to it. I asked what my lesson was for this visit. Great Walker moved a long table that was in the center of the longhouse. Underneath it was a long pit for fires. He lit it and told me that today I would learn the foot movements for drumming. When moving around a circle, the steps are:
When standing still, the steps are:
Next, Great Walker told me that the beads for the necklace will come. I am to make a necklace that will be worn during ceremonies. The beads must be white and made of either stone, clay, or deer bone. Finally, Great Walker told me that I was invited to merge with him when drumming for others' journeys if I wish. It may be helpful especially at the beginning. I could call him before the merge by playing the heartbeat rhythm on the drum. I asked if I could merge with him now so that I could feel what it was like. He agreed. When I merged, I immediately felt power in my muscles. As we drummed, I felt a clear connection between the drum and my/his/our heart. The heart seemed to resonate with each beat, triangulating the drummer, the drum and the heart. I also felt Great Walker's old-body, like scars of a human form that were distant and infused with spirit energy. We drummed together for some time. Callback I disengaged and thanked Great Walker before returning. Return to Ordinary Reality |
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