Drum Journey (Recording): ~30 minutes
This journey was to inquire more deeply about the purpose of my incarnation. I was called to Upper World. I arrived barefoot and in the usual muslin outfit I wear in Lower World. I entered the Hall of Knowledge, as I was immediately drawn there. Hummingbird met me in the hall. I entered the library and Hummingbird brought me a large, red book. I knew the answer to my question was inside, but I was unable to look. Teacher (Bell'ana) arrived to take me away on a different journey. I realized that the journey was within the book. There were no words or pages, but a vortex I needed to enter. So, with the CHSes in attendance, I opened the cover and dove into the bright circles of light. As it was with my meditations in OR recently, I received the message that I was here to "observe and report." This was no life of ambition; I am on a "vacation" life. Nothing grand will happen. I will not be influential or famous. Let all that go. I am her merely to observe and report. I am not special. I have no real gifts beyond what anyone else is capable of having. This was depressing. Do you believe these words? Bell'ana asked. I checked my body for a response. "Not really," I said. On the one hand, it was a relief not to have to strive for anything. On the other, it was sad to think I will not experience the metaphysical at my will in this lifetime (beyond random synchronicities). I returned to the library table and wept (also in OR). Hummingbird was there. "I have no Spirit. It's true," I said. "I am not special. I have no gifts. All this is made up. That is why I cannot receive anything helpful; I cannot imagine it." I went on lamenting my skeptical and logical mind. I asked Spirit to remove it from me, or at least lessen it considerably so it wouldn't get in my way. Bargaining! I would give up punctuality or organizational skills just to be closer to/communicate with Spirit... It was all a it pathetic, and I knew that, so I let it all go. The Callback sounded. I thanked Hummingbird and Bell'ana and returned.
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Drum Journey (Recording): ~15 minutes
During my morning meditation, I received a call to journey. I had no intention except to find out for what I was being called. I was immediately drawn to Upper World. Upper World: I entered and Teacher (Bell'anna) emerged from a stone in the walkway to the Hall of Knowledge. She took me into the main library, which had been redecorated into more of a rustic atmosphere, with wooden furniture and a small fire pit at the center. I sat there and she told me Grandmother would be joining us. Teacher brought down a large red book and handed it to me. These are the stories of your female ancestors, Teacher said. Grandmother had appeared now and was tending the fire as I looked through the book. I saw my mother, her mother, her mother, and so on. I saw men as well, being abusive to the women, physically, sexually, and emotionally. finally landed on an image of a smiling, upturned face of a woman who could have been in her 20s as easily as her 50s. Youthful and joyful. Your have entered the croning time. You have no daughters. This is your time to end the cycle of violence. Draw your power to you. The pain ends with you. Teacher handed me a staff that had a bird on top of it—a hawk?—which flew away, leaving the feathers behind attached to the top of the staff. The top was encrusted with gemstones (mainly moonstone) and had a smooth space where the hand would go. The base was orange and red with fire colors and from it came vines that snaked up the staff in various shades of green. This is your crone staff, Nashawe. You will recreate it in Ordinary Reality. She threw it on the fire, where Grandmother poked at it. The staff dissolved into sparks of fire. It will be here for you when you are in Non-ordinary Reality, Teacher told me. Then, Grandmother gave me a capsule, which I swallowed. This is moss beneath the Tree of Knowledge outside of my home, Grandmother said. Let it fill you with ancestral knowledge and belief in your own experience. You are no longer a child. You are stepping into elder. You will come to us for more training, but it is time for you to embrace your own knowledge and share it. I sat for a moment with my teachers and watched the fire. Callback sounded. I thanked them both deeply and returned. Drum Journey (Recorded drumming): ~15 minutes
Lower World Grey Wolf Mother accompanied me to the hot spring entrance in spirit form, as she had left with me before. We arrived together, and she again assumed full form as we reached LW. We walked to the Sacred Fire Circle, where all the CHSes were gathered. GWM sat in front of Reeds Blowing. Reed Blowing spoke, saying: You have accomplished the task you set out to accomplish. regardless of the outcome, we are with you always. I spoke afterward, thanking everyone, especially GWM and RB. Great Walker came out and placed a red mark on my left shoulder, I was not certain what this was for. My Nashawe symbol came ot life on my right leg. GW began to drum. He asked me to drum and dance with him, which I did. The others began to sing/vocalize in their respective ways: GWM howled, Frog chirped, the wings of Hummingbird whirred, Tree rustled its leaves, Grandmother sang a low tone, RB chanted, Bell'ana made the song of the spheres, Turtle croaked and drummed his shell, Owl hooted, Black Hawk cried, Snake hissed, Raccoon chittered... After some time, they all took a piece of my body away and performed their own work on it. My energy merged with the fire until they were done. As the Callback sounded, my pieces came flying back together and I was whole again. I thanked everyone and expressed that I was sad to leave GWM in LW. I was grateful for her protection. Return to OR Drum Journey (Recording): ~15 minutes
Upper World Note: I had a difficult time beginning the journey because I was thinking about the workshop I led the day before: Introduction to Shamanic Journeying. There were five women, all of whom were new to shamanism. After a few minutes, I was able to make it to Upper World. From the moment I arrived, I felt an urgency to see Reeds Blowing. I ran all the way to his tree cave, leaving an offering of wildflower heads surrounding the triangular Taos stone I had brought to the workshop the day before (to use as a "talking stone"). I was distraught, concerned that I had not done the workshop well by spirit standards (!). I felt I had not been able to answer well the challenging questions and comments I got from one workshop attendee: Why power animals? Is there danger in the spirit world? The drum callback sounds threatening to me... Reed Blowing took the stone and blessed it. He smiled and said that I had answered fine; I explained (there is no real danger, only what you may not yet be ready to see) gave examples (I was bitten by a snake on my first journey. Later it was explained this may have been an early dismemberment.), I told her what she needed to know (According to the teachings, there was a time when animals and humans spoke the same language. Journeying is our way to reestablish our connection.). Next time, I could say that "these are the teachings" and leave it at that. As for the threatening callback (which I did not address), I could say that it is a matter of perception. Come, he said, it is time for your drumming lesson. We walked behind his tree and into a clearing at the base of a mountain. There was a large pow-wow drum on the ground. Great Walker stood at one edge. Reeds Blowing stood near him at the drum. I stood opposite Reeds Blowing. We began drumming in unison. Soon, Bell'anna joined us. The sound of the drum was incredible. The vibrations shook the land and air around us. The vibrations turned deep pink and rose in a column to the atmosphere. It surrounded Upper World and encased it in a circle of sound. The vibrations shook us and all around us.I envisioned the cells in my body all moving and re-energizing. The field enveloping UW released and the column went back into the drum, then moved out forcefully into each of the drummers. Once the drumming stopped, I sat on the ground. Great Walker handed me my drum, and told me to drum now. As I did, I saw the vision of the buffalo whose hide covers my drum. He was majestic and black-furred. I saw his watery eyes. He grazed and ambled through the field. I was amazed by his beauty. I then saw his death and the process of his skinning—blood and sinew. I tried to imagine the shift from living to dead, from spirit inhabiting the body to the skin on the wooden worktable, drying. I saw Lee Lujan receiving the skin. Working it. Making this drum. I saw the Cottonwood tree. I moved through its seasons. Buds and leaves and decay and buds again. I saw bugs and birds making homes in it. I saw its bark forming and shedding over the years. I saw it being cut down... Callback I thanked my teachers and returned. Return to Ordinary Reality. Drum Journey (Recording): ~15 minutes
Lower World The purpose of this journey was to receive a drumming teaching, but also to request guidance about the shamanic journeying workshop I am leading in two days. I went to the Sacred Fire Circle, where all the CHSes were gathered. I asked for any advice about what I should include in the workshop. Grandmother stood and said: Ancestors. It is important for those who journey to know that the ancestors are there. There are the ancestors of blood lineage and there are spirit ancestors of life incarnations. Bell'anna stood and opened her robe to reveal the universe. She said: Connection and communication. We are all connected to the universe. We communicate with all that is within it, was within it, and all that ever will be. Journey with this knowledge and purpose. Reeds Blowing stood and said: Nature. Plant life speaks to us constantly. Animals as well. Journey to hear what plants and animals want to share with us. Rekindle the communication with them. Return home to them in the journeys you make. I turned to Great Walker for his teaching on the drum. Suddenly, I was transported to a large field where I was drumming and dancing energetically, wearing a white scarf. This scarf represented both Reeds Blowing's white deerskin cape and Great Walker's white beads. I felt the message that I would wear the white scarf (or have it nearby) when I give the workshop to keep these teachers with me. As I danced and drummed, I head Great Walker tell me that I should consider the other not as the other. This means, hold the person for whom you are drumming as part of yourself, part of the great web of life. The healing drum energy moves out into the atmosphere and knows where to land. It does not know the object-beings as separate. They are connected. Therefore, when drumming, consider the other not as the other but as one of everything, including the drum, the drummer, and the beat. Callback I thanked the CHSes and returned. Return to Ordinary Reality |
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