Drum Journey (Recording): ~30 minutes
During my morning meditation, I again received a call to journey. As it was with my last journey, I had no intention. I was called to Lower World.
Lower World: It was dusk. A pink, purple, and yellow sunset illuminated the mountains ahead of me. Hummingbird came to greet me. It had been some time since I journeyed, and I was ashamed. I said something of the sort to Hummingbird, but even as the words left my lips, I could see that they were irrelevant. Hummingbird flew off eastward, and I followed.
On the path, I stopped to lean against a tree as I was very overcome and tired. I thought I needed to set an intention, so I tried to. My OR shamanic teacher, Elaine, told me I should ask about a recent dream I had.* My mind went into the dream again and replayed the confusing part. Hummingbird said, You already know the meaning of the dream.
I was transported quickly to a field where there was a sacred fire with a ring of small fires around it. Reeds Blowing sat at the edge of it, sprinkling powdered herbs into the fire. I wondered what he was doing here, since I usually meet him in Upper World unless there is a gathering at the council fire. I knew not to ask, though. Grandmother, too, was there, tearing up pieces of red organ meat and throwing them on the fire. Great Walker drummed in the background.
I noticed then that I had a blue plaster stuck to my lower abdomen. I asked what it was. Reeds Blowing said it was made of Blue Poppy, Camphor, Mustard, and other herbs. I asked Grandmother what she was putting on the fire. Your uterus, she said. I was shocked. "Does that mean I don't have a uterus anymore?" Of course not, this is a symbol. This is your old uterus. It is diseased, carrying the pain of your ancestors. You will receive a new one.
Grandmother began singing and walking around the fire. She gestured violently toward the fire, as if casting out dark energy. The flames rose with each gesturing. Grandmother took a burning stick from the fire and placed it on my abdomen. I was moving quickly without volition: lying down, sitting up, standing... She placed her hands on my lower back and abdomen as she sang.
She led me around the fire, singing. Great Walker tossed me my drum, and I drummed along and sang with her. Soon, I felt pressure in my abdomen. The plaster was removed. I crouched on the grass and passed the uterus out of my body. It was not painful, but it was difficult work.
Grandmother took it and threw it on the fire. Immediately, smoke-like beings rose from the fire and into the atmosphere. I recognized them as my ancestors—women and men. They clouded the sky. She and Reeds Blowing began to chant together. Reeds Blowing took a staff and stirred in the air. This whipped the smokey spirit beings around like cotton candy on his staff. He then hurled them into space. I could see or sense them all settling into the lost soul places where they belonged if they had allowed themselves to return Home and be redistributed as Nature intended.
Grandmother crafted a small clay vessel within the fire. She blew into its opening spirit energy and placed various herbs within it. This, she placed over my abdomen, where it sunk in, assuming the place of my old uterus.
I was very tired. I found myself mentally drifting, then "awoke" to find myself lying in a room on a bed, recovering. Everything felt very slow. I heard Grandmother's voice tell me that I needed to rest now.
Callback sounded. I thanked, Hummingbird, Reeds Blowing, Grandmother, and Great Walker then returned.
*Friends of my estranged husband banged a hole in my wall, claiming that I was hiding gold in there. I assured them I was not. They found nothing in the walls and retreated. I cheekily told them they owed me $20 to fix the hole. Upon waking, I thought that it meant I was not hiding any of my gifts. But as I journeyed, I thought it perhaps it meant that I had none to hide. Then I realized it was not about the gifts themselves, but the hiding part. What of worth am I hiding? Nothing. And destruction of my home must be compensated for.