Drum Journey (Self-drumming): ~15 minutes
Lower World My drum was waiting for me as I wandered behind the drop-off point, away from Sacred Circle. This way is tha area of many terrains, which often change and shift as I walk through them. This time, I headed along my usual dirt path, and played my drum. As I did, I noticed that several compassionate helping spirits began to join me as if we were marching in a parade! It was very joyful, even though I didn't know where I was going. I saw a ravine, but did not go down into it. I remember thinking, "Isn't it odd how often I'm on a precipice, both here and in Upper World?" I was drawn toward a jungle, which, as I approached, became a dark wooded area. I remembered this area from previous journeys. I have met forest-dwellers there. I came upon a campfire and knew to sit there. Then, Snake came with her three eggs and pushed them toward the fire opposite me. She told me to drum the eggs a healing. I did so, watching the sound of the drum envelop them and move around each of them. The sound moved to Snake and she allowed it to wrap around the length of her body. Soon, she moved on and the next CHS came, Raccoon. I realized that I was being asked to offer a drum healing to all the CHSes. After Raccoon came Owl, then Black Hawk, then Hummingbird, Frog, Tree, and Turtle. Grandmother came and danced in the waves of the drumsound. She washed it over her like sage smoke. Teacher Bell'ana opened her white robes and let the drum sound inside. Reeds Blowing also folded up the drum healing into this robe and washed it over his face. I was shy to heal him with the drum—even more than Grandmother and Bell'ana for some reason—perhaps because he has been so active in my teachings. After Reeds Blowing, Water Buffalo and Mother Bear came. Afterward, Great Walker appeared and sat opposite me and we drummed. As we did, he told me that this lesson was about staying in the moment of the drum—each beat, each resonance of the beat. Even though the beats move fast, there is a stillness in the rhythm. This was something to learn about life as well: Being suspended in the moment, listening and being healed by it. We continued to drum and I felt the sounds of drum I was beating as separate from me. There was my hand, beating the drum, but I could not feel it. I could not feel the mallet striking the drum head. I only heard the beats. We continued this for some time before I sounded the callback. I thanked all the CHSes. Return to Ordinary Reality
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Drum Journey (Recording): ~15 minutes
Upper World When I arrived, I headed to the Hall of Knowledge and retrieved my drum from the nook in the wall. I walked behind the Hall, not sure where I was supposed to be going, and no one was there to assist me. As I walked farther, the ground began to give out underneath me and I slid down into a ravine. At the bottom, there was a fire and what looked to be a circle of people. When I landed from the fall, I could see it was Spirit of the Drum alone. He was still wearing the white beaded headdress and breastplate. He was drumming and offered me to receive the healing he was giving. He raised his drum and beat it to the sky, then told me to see the rhythm of the drum. I saw spirit scooped up in the bowl of the drum, then sent to my body. I was outside the image, looking at it. Spirit of the Drum told me to receive the healing myself. In other words, step in. It took me two tries but I was able to step in and stay present to receive the healing drum energy. This did not feel exactly like the Tuvan drum healing I had learned and seen, because I was seeing the energy where I had not before (I had only felt it). I also felt the drum energy blast through my chest, which was very blocked with grief. After a few healing rounds, we sat at the fire and I asked Spirit of the Drum for my next lesson. But first, I asked if he had a name I could call him by. He gave me a difficult name that made no sense. We both laughed. You could call me Healer, he said. I told him that I might as well call him shaman. He nodded and smiled. In my tribe, I am called Great Walker. You can call me that. You are in the same tribe, after all. You were once a great walker yourself. And I am your spiritual ancestor. And this grief you carry. This trying to be of the world you are in. There is no need for it. You do not have to fit there. If you try, you will always fail because you are not of that world. Your healer friend* in Ordinary Reality was right: You have always been an orphan. Your Ordinary Reality world is not your real family. You are of the spirit world, just visiting Ordinary Reality. We all do! That is why there is no need even to fear death. That fear is also taught to you by Ordinary Reality thinking. There is suffering in that thinking. There is suffering in your trying to fit. You already have connection. You can be in both worlds. You know this, which is why your tears reach you now even in Ordinary Reality. I told Great Walker that I felt I was losing my connection in the journey. He said I was supposed to; that is the lesson: Being fluid between the worlds. We spent the rest of the time drumming together. Callback I thanked Great Walker, I thanked and returned my drum to its place, then returned. Return to Ordinary Reality *Abdi Assadi Drum Journey (Recording): ~15 minutes
Lower World The journey down to lower world was different this time. The tunnel that leads from the base of the hot spring to LW was filled with water. I rode a small current down to the spot where I am typically deposited on the mesa. The meeting circle was filled with all my teachers, helping spirit animals, Tree, and Fire. On the way, I touched my left cheek and found that the mark Fire had made on me during the last journey was still there. Behind Fire was a Native American elder, wearing a white bead headdress and white bead necklace. I was told he was my drum teacher. He was the Spirit of the Drum. The first thing he told me was that I would be working in OR with the buffalo hide/cottonwood drum that Taos Pueblo elder Lee Lujan made for me. Reeds Blowing handed me the NOR version of it, which I had left in Upper World in the nook outside the Hall of Knowledge for safe keeping. Drum also said that also said that I was to tie a piece of ribbon or leather around the strings of the drum—one for each day on this initiation/training. The first lesson was to visualize the drum beats. I was to train myself to see the sound of the drum. It was important to know where the sound was going. We practiced together, playing and watching the sound. I saw the beats played and emanating from the drum like clear vapors. They rose and floated away like smoke. The others in the circle were enveloped by the sound vapors and cloaked in them. We continued to play until callback. I knew I was to practice this until next lesson. Callback I thanked all the spirits and returned.. Return to Ordinary Reality Drum Journey (Recording): ~15 minutes
Upper World I realized when I arrived that I had not really formulated a question to ask. I sat for a moment at the beginning of the path leading to the Hall of Knowledge. I felt a pull to go inside, which I did. I entered a long library and went right to the top shelf where there were many volumes of Questions. These were all the questions I would ever ask in my life. I opened to the page I needed, then received the question: "How should I teach shamanic journeying in the upcoming workshop I am facilitating?" I left the Hall of Knowledge and went to see Reeds Blowing. I gathered a bouquet of wild flowers as an offering, as I usually do. As I walked, I wondered if this was disrespectful to the flowers. Then I received the message that they never die. In fact, Reeds Blowing uses them—still in bloom—to line the walls of the tree cave. Reeds Blowing greeted me at the entrance to the cave with a warm hug. I asked him my question. He led me deep into the cave, where we walked and talked. He told me: Remind those who journey that spirits are always with them. The journey is a chance to meet to receive guidance and information and healing. We will not be troubled or angered if they do not come; we are here all the time anyway. We welcome the visit and are here to assist when needed. When they first journey, they may be guided by a helping spirit that will take them to Upper or Lower World. This may or may not be a spirit that is theirs alone; be sure to ask. We sat opposite each other and held hands so that I could merge with some of his energy. He reminded me that I am about to begin my drum initiation. I was told that I will be giving up much, but will emerge stronger. One of the items is tobacco. Reeds Blowing told me, You will only use tobacco as an offering during your drum initiation. We spent the rest of the journey in silence. I allowed the sounds of the drum to move through me. Callback I thanked Reeds Blowing and The Hall of Knowledge. Return to Ordinary Reality Drum Journey (Recording): ~15 minutes Lower World When I arrived, I was instantly swept up by a giant water bird (stork? crane?) who carried me to the left of my arrival point on the mesa. With his long legs, he bounded over terrains I had seen before—grasslands, tundra, jungle—until we reached the edge of the world. There, he swooped down and we flew to a lower-level world. IT appeared to be lush with mountains, grasses and a large body of water at its center. We dove into the water and swam downward through another tunnel at the base. From here, I was deposited into blackness. In the dark around me, I saw a few golden orbs that had fine golden hairs on them. They floated around with me. I heard the question, "Why have you come here?" and I asked how I could better understand the darkness inside of me. "The block," as I call it. I had come asking this question before but asked for clarity about what it is and how I can remove it. I remained in darkness for some time, with the understanding that this was where I was supposed to be for a while. Then the waterbird came back to retrieved me in reverse—up the tunnel, through the water, out into space, up onto Lower World and backwards over the many terrains. I was deposited at the Sacred Fire Circle. Fire burned and I sat in front of him. He reached a tongue out and lashed two horizontal burn marks on my cheekbone, with a half-circle at their base. Then Fire told me, "This is your mark. It symbolizes travel, with a solid and grounded base." I understood that from now on, when I journey, I will wear this mark in some way. Fire continued, "Your given name will be Nasha'we. It means, 'The one who travels by any means.' You may search for this name in Ordinary Reality. Maybe you will find another definition, but here it means, 'The one who travels by any means.' You may travel physically in Ordinary Reality, by journeying, drumming, playing flute, dancing, singing... "You will be given this name Nasha'we when you have removed the dark block and let movement flow through you. Until then, you will use this name as a mantra, guiding you through the work. You will work with the drum, here in the spirit realm, and with your therapist in Ordinary Reality. You will work every day. You will complete the fifty days of drumming and work in this way as well. Then you will be given the name, Nasha'we." When Fire was finished, I stayed by the heat of the flame, meditating in its light and heat. Callback I thanked Fire and the giant water bird. Return to Ordinary Reality
Note: On 3/12, I researched the word "nashawe." It is a Hudson River Native American word meaning, "in between." In Wampanoag, the Algonquian language, it is defined this as "between the paths" or "where the brooks (or streams) meet." (Understanding Algonquian Indian Words, Aquidneck Indian Council, 1996). I found this of interest for a number of reasons:
1. I live in a Hudson River village, very close to the water. 2. The name came with the symbol of two "streams" meeting at a base. 3. Fire said that I would receive the name when I "let movement flow through" me. There is also a sense here of "the middle way" in the Tao and Buddhism that is the path of balance. The shaman also travels between the worlds, traveling through the middle/World Tree. |
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