Drum Journey (Self-drumming): ~10 minutes Upper World When I arrived, I was prostrate on the bricks leading to the Hall of Knowledge. I stood up and retrieved my drum from its space by the entry. I continued to walk, with purpose, past the Hall and behind it, even though I was unsure where I was going. The path led into a snowy area. The snow became white crystals. I kept walking. Past the crystal land, the landscape became cloudy, as though I were walking in fog. The drum scooped me up and I rode in it, floating through the fog. I saw now that it was smoke. The drum was bing smudged by burning leaves. They were long and thin leaves. I saw the word sativa in the air. The drum showed me that I could smudge it by blowing this smoke on it. I asked what other offerings I could make. Just then, the spirit of the buffalo whose hide is on my drum came to me again. It was grazing. On the ground were purple flowers with a yellow center. They may have been like this thunbergia erecta flower shown. Buffalo told me that I could find these and leave them as an offering. Also, leaving a "spirit meal" of corn meal is also a good idea. Now the drum was in front of me and I gazed into it. The drum face became a scrying mirror, and I saw the faces of all my relatives—back as far as my great-grandparents. Once the faces moved through, one by one, my father's returned. He was mouthing something, but I could not understand. Then I heard, "The root is real" repeated over and over. I was moved to see my father's face and wanted to communicate with him. But just as I got emotional, he sent a burst of fire across the drum head, blazing out all the images there. Callback I thanked the CHSes and left. Return to Ordinary Reality
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Drum Journey (Recording): ~15 minutes
Upper World Note: I had a difficult time beginning the journey because I was thinking about the workshop I led the day before: Introduction to Shamanic Journeying. There were five women, all of whom were new to shamanism. After a few minutes, I was able to make it to Upper World. From the moment I arrived, I felt an urgency to see Reeds Blowing. I ran all the way to his tree cave, leaving an offering of wildflower heads surrounding the triangular Taos stone I had brought to the workshop the day before (to use as a "talking stone"). I was distraught, concerned that I had not done the workshop well by spirit standards (!). I felt I had not been able to answer well the challenging questions and comments I got from one workshop attendee: Why power animals? Is there danger in the spirit world? The drum callback sounds threatening to me... Reed Blowing took the stone and blessed it. He smiled and said that I had answered fine; I explained (there is no real danger, only what you may not yet be ready to see) gave examples (I was bitten by a snake on my first journey. Later it was explained this may have been an early dismemberment.), I told her what she needed to know (According to the teachings, there was a time when animals and humans spoke the same language. Journeying is our way to reestablish our connection.). Next time, I could say that "these are the teachings" and leave it at that. As for the threatening callback (which I did not address), I could say that it is a matter of perception. Come, he said, it is time for your drumming lesson. We walked behind his tree and into a clearing at the base of a mountain. There was a large pow-wow drum on the ground. Great Walker stood at one edge. Reeds Blowing stood near him at the drum. I stood opposite Reeds Blowing. We began drumming in unison. Soon, Bell'anna joined us. The sound of the drum was incredible. The vibrations shook the land and air around us. The vibrations turned deep pink and rose in a column to the atmosphere. It surrounded Upper World and encased it in a circle of sound. The vibrations shook us and all around us.I envisioned the cells in my body all moving and re-energizing. The field enveloping UW released and the column went back into the drum, then moved out forcefully into each of the drummers. Once the drumming stopped, I sat on the ground. Great Walker handed me my drum, and told me to drum now. As I did, I saw the vision of the buffalo whose hide covers my drum. He was majestic and black-furred. I saw his watery eyes. He grazed and ambled through the field. I was amazed by his beauty. I then saw his death and the process of his skinning—blood and sinew. I tried to imagine the shift from living to dead, from spirit inhabiting the body to the skin on the wooden worktable, drying. I saw Lee Lujan receiving the skin. Working it. Making this drum. I saw the Cottonwood tree. I moved through its seasons. Buds and leaves and decay and buds again. I saw bugs and birds making homes in it. I saw its bark forming and shedding over the years. I saw it being cut down... Callback I thanked my teachers and returned. Return to Ordinary Reality. Drum Journey (Recording): ~15 minutes
Upper World I was called to the Hall of Knowledge. When I entered the library, the ornate room full of books, tables, and reading chairs changed into an Algonquin longhouse. At one end, I saw Great Walker making a drum. This will be your final project after the initiation. You will make your own drum. I asked what it should be made of. Deer, likely. There are many where you live and you are connected to them. They can carry you on your journeys. "What kind of wood?" I asked. Maple, cedar... That is not as important as every tree is connected to you and you to it. I asked what my lesson was for this visit. Great Walker moved a long table that was in the center of the longhouse. Underneath it was a long pit for fires. He lit it and told me that today I would learn the foot movements for drumming. When moving around a circle, the steps are:
When standing still, the steps are:
Next, Great Walker told me that the beads for the necklace will come. I am to make a necklace that will be worn during ceremonies. The beads must be white and made of either stone, clay, or deer bone. Finally, Great Walker told me that I was invited to merge with him when drumming for others' journeys if I wish. It may be helpful especially at the beginning. I could call him before the merge by playing the heartbeat rhythm on the drum. I asked if I could merge with him now so that I could feel what it was like. He agreed. When I merged, I immediately felt power in my muscles. As we drummed, I felt a clear connection between the drum and my/his/our heart. The heart seemed to resonate with each beat, triangulating the drummer, the drum and the heart. I also felt Great Walker's old-body, like scars of a human form that were distant and infused with spirit energy. We drummed together for some time. Callback I disengaged and thanked Great Walker before returning. Return to Ordinary Reality Drum Journey (Recording): ~15 minutes
Upper World When I arrived, I headed to the Hall of Knowledge and retrieved my drum from the nook in the wall. I walked behind the Hall, not sure where I was supposed to be going, and no one was there to assist me. As I walked farther, the ground began to give out underneath me and I slid down into a ravine. At the bottom, there was a fire and what looked to be a circle of people. When I landed from the fall, I could see it was Spirit of the Drum alone. He was still wearing the white beaded headdress and breastplate. He was drumming and offered me to receive the healing he was giving. He raised his drum and beat it to the sky, then told me to see the rhythm of the drum. I saw spirit scooped up in the bowl of the drum, then sent to my body. I was outside the image, looking at it. Spirit of the Drum told me to receive the healing myself. In other words, step in. It took me two tries but I was able to step in and stay present to receive the healing drum energy. This did not feel exactly like the Tuvan drum healing I had learned and seen, because I was seeing the energy where I had not before (I had only felt it). I also felt the drum energy blast through my chest, which was very blocked with grief. After a few healing rounds, we sat at the fire and I asked Spirit of the Drum for my next lesson. But first, I asked if he had a name I could call him by. He gave me a difficult name that made no sense. We both laughed. You could call me Healer, he said. I told him that I might as well call him shaman. He nodded and smiled. In my tribe, I am called Great Walker. You can call me that. You are in the same tribe, after all. You were once a great walker yourself. And I am your spiritual ancestor. And this grief you carry. This trying to be of the world you are in. There is no need for it. You do not have to fit there. If you try, you will always fail because you are not of that world. Your healer friend* in Ordinary Reality was right: You have always been an orphan. Your Ordinary Reality world is not your real family. You are of the spirit world, just visiting Ordinary Reality. We all do! That is why there is no need even to fear death. That fear is also taught to you by Ordinary Reality thinking. There is suffering in that thinking. There is suffering in your trying to fit. You already have connection. You can be in both worlds. You know this, which is why your tears reach you now even in Ordinary Reality. I told Great Walker that I felt I was losing my connection in the journey. He said I was supposed to; that is the lesson: Being fluid between the worlds. We spent the rest of the time drumming together. Callback I thanked Great Walker, I thanked and returned my drum to its place, then returned. Return to Ordinary Reality *Abdi Assadi Drum Journey (Recording): ~15 minutes
Upper World I realized when I arrived that I had not really formulated a question to ask. I sat for a moment at the beginning of the path leading to the Hall of Knowledge. I felt a pull to go inside, which I did. I entered a long library and went right to the top shelf where there were many volumes of Questions. These were all the questions I would ever ask in my life. I opened to the page I needed, then received the question: "How should I teach shamanic journeying in the upcoming workshop I am facilitating?" I left the Hall of Knowledge and went to see Reeds Blowing. I gathered a bouquet of wild flowers as an offering, as I usually do. As I walked, I wondered if this was disrespectful to the flowers. Then I received the message that they never die. In fact, Reeds Blowing uses them—still in bloom—to line the walls of the tree cave. Reeds Blowing greeted me at the entrance to the cave with a warm hug. I asked him my question. He led me deep into the cave, where we walked and talked. He told me: Remind those who journey that spirits are always with them. The journey is a chance to meet to receive guidance and information and healing. We will not be troubled or angered if they do not come; we are here all the time anyway. We welcome the visit and are here to assist when needed. When they first journey, they may be guided by a helping spirit that will take them to Upper or Lower World. This may or may not be a spirit that is theirs alone; be sure to ask. We sat opposite each other and held hands so that I could merge with some of his energy. He reminded me that I am about to begin my drum initiation. I was told that I will be giving up much, but will emerge stronger. One of the items is tobacco. Reeds Blowing told me, You will only use tobacco as an offering during your drum initiation. We spent the rest of the journey in silence. I allowed the sounds of the drum to move through me. Callback I thanked Reeds Blowing and The Hall of Knowledge. Return to Ordinary Reality |
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